put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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