she looked like the bat from fern gully.
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
Actions speak louder than pants.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Randomize
