dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
Randomize
