I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
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