I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Randomize