With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Randomize
