hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
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