On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
