Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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