my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
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