Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
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