So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
