Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
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