shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
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