I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
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