Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Randomize