Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize
