My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
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