so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
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