It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
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