Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize
