and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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