they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
ok first of all what the fuck
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
