just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
