Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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