She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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