I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
