And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
Randomize