SEEEEXXX PLEASE
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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