it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
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