Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
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