ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize