I need help removing her.
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
