bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
