You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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