My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Randomize
