Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
2020 sucks, I want a refund
Randomize