I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
I AM VODKA MAN
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize
