I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
Randomize
