I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
Randomize
