Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Randomize
