Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
no. you can't hotbox the world.
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
Randomize
