i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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