I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
Randomize
