What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
Randomize