yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
