no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
