I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
the condom got lost in my hair
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Randomize
