If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
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