I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
Randomize
